But I only want to know when it's going to stop hurting, when I'm going to stop dreaming about him, stop thinking about him, stop wanting him, stop needing him. Despite all of the people around me, I feel empty, lonely. I only want him to love me again.
Why? Why can't he love me? Why doesn't he want to be with me? Why is she so much better?
So many why questions, so many answers I'll never have.
This isn't the way I pictured having my first baby. A baby is supposed to have a mommy and daddy who love each other, who want to be together and raise a family together.
We did, once.
Don't get me wrong, I will love this baby with all of my heart, and I will be the best single mom anyone's ever seen.
I just wish I could have given the baby everything he/she deserved from the moment of conception.